Harvard sweatshirts are displayed for sale in a school store window on the Harvard University campus in Cambridge, Massachusetts, on April 15, 2025.My father did not speak to me for four days after I got into Harvard University last month.On March 27, I joined approximately 385,000 other high school applicants around the world, holding my breath, closing my eyes, and clicking the ominous “View Application Status” button in my Harvard portal.My body reacted before my brain did, dispersing a breath of disbelief from my lungs as I fell back in my chair. My mother screamed, and my father simply stared at the screen.All I felt was elation in that moment... until I realised my father was not staring because he shared my joy. As I waited for the spell he was under to break — for him to jump up and tearfully congratulate me as I had seen other dads do in the countless “college reaction” videos online — I came to understand that, for him, my acceptance evoked more complicated feelings than just pride.